the money pit
as some of you may know i bought an apartment earlier this year.
i know, how grown up is that?
and for the past four months i have been busy renovating the fuck out of my new abode so as to get it to a manner to which i wish to become accustomed.
and believe me it ain't been easy.
but my little corner of the world is almost ready for inhabitation, with the floors and carpet going in as i type.
and i cannot tell you how relieved i will be when it is done.
thus, with the light at the end of the interior decoration tunnel clearly visible, i present to you...
'things i have learned since deciding to buy a fixer-upperer':
- there are, like, a gazillion different types of toilets. and the people who sell them take them very seriously;
- there are, like, a gazillion trillion types of door handles, and the people who sell them take them even more seriously than the toilet merchants;
- despite all myths to the contrary, it is possible to find good tradesmen, builders, designers, etc. even ones who go above and beyond the call of duty, picking you up from work, buying you breakfast, etc;
- even if you pick paint that you believe to be the whitest of white, your walls may in fact turn out a most repulsive shade of lilac;
- spa jets in the bathtub may turn out to be too much of a luxury, but a pole in the living room is a MUST;
- it is possible to get excited about light fittings no matter how much you resist;
- even a custom-built, mega wardrobe may not be enough to fit all your clothes and shoes (if you're a clinically dperessed, raging clotheswhore who self-medicates through shopping like me, that is);
- you may think your style is classic early twentieth century art nouveau, but your apartment may still end up resembling a 1970s whorehouse.
i should totally have my own show now: 'la nadine eye for the straight guy'.
whaddya reckon?
22 Comments:
I love how you pretend that a 1970's whore house is a bad thing but we all know that's what you secretly want. You don't need to lie about the whole art nouveau thing
I love how you just casually drop in how you're builder "bought" you breakfast.
OR GOT UP AND MADE IT FOR YOU WHILE YOU SLEPT IN?
There are other ways to get your "door hung right" y'kmow.
thomasr
*Requesting photo post!*
damn right.
But I only liked the first 15 minutes of that show were they made fun of the straight guy and ran about like Clary on crack.
The actual home improvement stuff, it's bad enough living through a renovation, why would you actually wan to watch someone else doing that for LESIURE?
Lesiure? what is that?
I meant LEISURE.
Little Jay will never turn for me now.
jay? really?
i was always more about thom, the interior designer.
mainly because of the gratuitous 'h' in his name, but also because his child-bearing hips and maternal manner made him seem like a good mother for my future children.
oh, and thr: get your mind out of the gutter.
also, to hon: damn you and your insight. its like you know me or something.
You know, only BOYS are supposed to get their tradesmen out of the local gay rag.
oh, but honey, J could teach 'em to high kick, tap and break.
+ emotional lessons, and how to give flowers to the ladiez.
that's the kinda father I'm all about.
congratulations!
will there be a housewarming party?
will there be pictures?
i can't wait.
there will indeed be a housewarming party, treespotter.
i am planning a 'pimp my balcony!' extravaganza.
and there may be pictures, but never of me.
no, never of me.
How about when you get your kitchen renovated - and they come and rip your old kitchen out, and then realise the new kitchen won't be ready for another 6 weeks? Then you find yourself eating Thai on your bedroom floor for the fifth time this week, opening your bathroom cupboards to reveal casserole dishes and inviting friends over to make 'dust angels'...
ah sweet nicole (if you are in fact the nicole i think you are), the very thought of you and your friends making dust angels on your bedroom floors brings a smile to my lips and a tear to my eye.
see you at the glamfest tonight (again, if you are in fact the nicole i think you are).
Yeah, it sounds like a great show, you get assigned some straight guy, you make fun of this jacket and his bedroom, you take him to your house, pole action, have him make you breakfast and then send some tradespeople over to his house to take four months to jazz it up. I'd expect each show would have some awesome time lapse montage action. Way better than American nonsubtle product placement.
Later,
Ahdam.
I DEMAND YOU PITCH THAT TO EVERY POSSIBLE TELEVISION NETWORK, ADAM!
or you can get ms fits to do your dirty work, if you like. she knows people who know people.
Its not just the gratuitous 'h' and the child bearing hips...
Its the way he says things are "hawwwrabble" in that cute Boston accent of his.
Or is that just me?
I do have a soft spot for Kyan and his "work the product in from the back" philosophy though. There's a lesson there for all of us.
'Toilet merchants'?
I think you'll find they are called Toilet Mongers.
I LIKE SHINY!
It's very exciting that you've bought an apartment. That's my big goal for the next couple of years- save up a deposit for my own place.
Can i be first? can you come over and give my flat the "la Nads" treatment.
i'd be honoured, mex.
Good grief, woman, that's awfully grown up! Congratulations on the new pad. 1970s whorehouse sounds awesome.
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