textual harassment

a multimedia message received from my beloved joshua a few evenings ago:



















upon first viewing the above on the screen of my mobile telephone i was somewhat startled, not knowing from whom the message had been sent.

however i soon discovered it was from joshua (that playful cad!) and all was well with the world once more.

i soon found myself on a trip down memory lane, perusing those text messages that remain in my phone for one reason or another, yet to be deleted to make space for the many yet to come (i'm heaps popular you see and thus I have a phone that just won'’t quit).

and so I present to you, for your voyeuristic pleasure, a random selection of text messages from the mobile telephone of la nadine:


- There'’s nothing better than a random leg humping.

- WHERE ARE OUR HUSBANDS?

- 'Digital Penetration' - Now there's one i haven't heard before.

- Bridget Jones is a cunt.

- Straight to the wank bank.

- You don'’t think my Proud Marys could whoop your Bic Rungas?

- hi its patrick do u wanna go out with me sumtime ps dont tell any1 on the team.*

*(poor patrick had been given a fake number by an evil, lying strumpet at his high school. i would have gone out with him "sumtime" myself, but he lives in far north queensland. and i'd probably be arrested if i did. still, i never told any1 on the team.)

- Reese and Ryan. Over. I'm only just keeping it together.

- I threw up my dinner.

- Your rack is being admired by lovely boys.


this last one evoked a similar reaction in me as the mind reading pic, causing me to look out my bedroom windows in search of onlookers. sadly the only things i found lurking outside were an abandoned shopping trolley and the neighbourhood stray. the sender, miss jessculture, later explained that she had been passing a pic of my baps round at a social gathering full of hotties. i tried to be offended by this. i wasn't.

if you sent me any of the above messages, bless you for filling my phone (and indeed my life) with the joys of random insanity. i live for that shit.

so does any1 else have random texts they would like to share with the rest of us?

go on. its liberating.